Should you let your partner choose their own engagement ring? 

Should you let your partner choose their own engagement ring?

Should you let your partner choose their own engagement ring? you’ve found your person, and you want to propose; congratulations! But a big question; should you let them pick their own ring so it’s absolutely perfect, or do you take a risk and choose it yourself – but gain the element of surprise? We discuss the pros and cons, here. 

Pros of letting your partner choose: 

• Guaranteed to love it: They know their own taste best, so you can be sure they’ll choose something they adore. After all, they have to wear it every day! 
• The right size: No awkward post-proposal resizing necessary; they’ll pick a ring that fits perfectly from the get-go. This is especially important if choosing a ring with diamonds all the way around the band, as sometimes they can’t actually be resized. 
• A fun experience: Ring shopping together can be a lovely experience and a special memory in your relationship. 

Cons of letting your partner choose: 

• Loses the element of surprise: If they know exactly what ring they’re getting, it takes away the big reveal moment. If you choose rings in advance, they’ll also know the proposal is coming. 
• It can be thought of as ‘less romantic’: Some might say picking out the ring yourself is a grand romantic gesture that shows thought and effort, to almost prove how well you know your partner. 
• Potential for disagreement: If you have different tastes in jewellery, you might not agree on what constitutes the perfect ring. 
• Awkward budget chats: when choosing alone, you can set the exact budget you want (and stick to it). 

Finding a Middle Ground: 

• Choose together, but add a surprise yourself: You could pick the ring together but add an element of surprise, like a secret engraving inside the ring. 
• Narrow it down: You could select a few engagement ring options that you think they’d like, and then let them make the final choice. 
• Hint-dropping: Encourage your partner to drop hints or show you styles they like ahead of time, so you have some guidance but can still surprise them. 
• Pick the ring at a later date: many people like to propose with a ‘for now’ ring (I.e., a cheap ring, just as a symbol) and pick something perfect later, together. 

Want help finding ‘the one’?

Whether you decide to pick out the ring yourself or let your partner choose, what matters most is the love and commitment it represents. Every couple is different, there’s no ‘one size fits all’ when it comes to engagements and proposals! But if you’re looking for more advice, feel free to chat to our friendly team, who would love to answer any questions you may have.